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Wednesday, October 29, 2014

hidden heaven in malang : kondang merak beach

This hidden heaven called Kondang Merak beach. Well... I am a beach hopper. I love sea and beaches. And honestly saying, it's the most beautiful beach I ever seen. All of these photos were taken by my cellphone camera with no filter. And I'm not a pro-photographer. Hahaha...

Not many tourists visited this beach. This beach was not as popular as Kuta beach or all beaches in Bali. But this one was awesomely beautiful -well, it's true. Laid in Hindia sea or Indonesian sea in south of Java island, the waves were big and very VERY beautiful. Definitely recommended for beach-lovers.

Amazing thing about this beach is.... you can see many beautiful rocks, corals, marine fishes, feel the fresh sea breeze in a beautiful beach which feel like a private beach because it was very quiet !! Lunch was awesome. One very big portion of octopus, and huge tuna skewers with unlimited rice for IDR 55k (it was less than USD 5).

To reach this beach, you will need A LOT OF EFFORTS !!! You can follow a direction to Balekambang beach, then you will see a very VERY small signboard written : Kondang Merak. And you will enjoy 4 km driving in a road full of rocks and stones. But the scenery was worth every journey. Glad I can make it !!!!


Kondang Merak beach. Quiet and beautiful





Building a sandcastle


Tres joli !

Beautiful corals
And the sea lays under my feet





Let me take a selfie !


Believe it or not, most of fishermen here are all christians

Huge plate of octopus !

Huge beautiful rock with sparkling sea
Follow me !
Sun, sand, sea !!!
Huge tuna skewers !!!


Friday, October 24, 2014

sneak in my chinese culture part 2 : be a doctor

A heart-touching thing about Chinese parents is.... they are willing to sacrifice everything for their children. Even they have even nothing. And it will continue until they die. It's true.

Chinese parents are so generous to their kids. And even more generous to their grandkids. If they come from average to rich family, they will fulfill every needs of their kids. Even providing a house for them when they're getting married. Well, as summary, they have worked hard when they're young and they don't want their kids to feel their oh-so-hard-life like theirs.
For low income family, they will work very hard to put their kids in a good school, even they're willing to sacrifice their best food for their kids.

I can say that my grandparents and parents had a very difficult life when they were young. My grandpa had nothing when he started his business in Indonesia. Until now our family company is getting bigger and stronger. It's clear, very clear in my parents' eyes that they don't want me to feel their hard-old-days. So, they forced  persuaded me to become a doctor. Oh, and for your information, for Chinese people, doctors (or dentists) are the most prestigious title-job-profession ever.
And I have a lot of doctors and dentists in my family. And we practice together in 1 big clinic-chain.

For my parents, and most of Chinese parents, their proud come when they have relatives (son/daughter/brother/sister/in law) whom are doctors. I must admit that this thing was absolutely NON-SENSE. But.... that's them. My dad always tells me that his decision to put his kids in dental faculty is because.... he didn't have any opportunity to get a higher education. My grandpa pushed him to help at work and he has to left school. He always tells me this :
"My beloved daughter, if you're becoming doctor or dentist, you don't need to work to other people. You can be your own boss with your own knowledge and skill. You won't depend on anyone to survive. I'm not a conglomerate who owns huge companies which I can give to you. But I hope you can survive with your brain and cold hands."
In one side, I must admit that he's right. At least I don't depend on anyone to survive. 

And because my family is a religiously Buddhist family, they always teach me not to harm anybody. ANYBODY. No excuse. Even you hate that people. Everytime they told me not to squeeze poor people when they come in my clinic. We help, wisely. Rumour said that Chinese people are stingy. No-no, they're not stingy at all to others. Yes, they're stingy for themselves. They won't buy luxury things for themselves even they can provide it. They prefer to keep it for next generation. Kids, grandkids, future. Well, not all.... But TRADITIONAL chinese family like mine, normally do this.

And first question that will pop up if you're going to introduce him or her to your parents : Is he/she a doctor ?

Or if you want to get their blessing with your new relationship, simply tell them : I'm dating a doctor.  

2 days off, yay ! :)

Bali and Singapore lectures both have confirmed today. Very proud and happy that I am being invited to Prime Speak Limited Invitation by Invisalign next month. Definitely will go and meet lotsa awesome colleagues there !!! Yay !!!!

I will take a break for 2 days since tomorrow is public holiday. Therefore, I will have a long weekend ! No work tomorrow ;) I will drive to the beach in Malang tonight after work and stay overnight to watch sunrise. There's a quite epic moment before I rent a room to stay. FYI, this beach is in a very VERY remote area in south Malang. No hotels, no cottages, so I will stay with local people. I called a number I got to get a right direction and of course.... to rent a room to stay.

And those villagers seemed UNFAMILIAR with tourits who booked a room in advance. While for me, I am a triple-check-planner. I have to plan everything in advance. Well, quite unbelieveable with their 'booking-system'. All of them were speaking in Javanese, so I spoke to them in Javanese as well.... And their booking confirmation is just : "Monggo mbak, langsung dateng." which means.... "Ok you can come."

They didn't even ask my name.... my address.... my phone number to re-confirm before the date. Ok, forget about the e-mail address. But at least, please ask me who I am and what's my number, guys.... How if you have prepared room and everything for me and I don't show up ??
I think, I should teach them strategy in business management.

But anyway....sun, sand, sea, here I come !!!! Woooooooohooooooo....

Thursday, October 23, 2014

sneak in my chinese culture part 1 : being nice to people

I was born in a very strong Chinese culture, which inside.... we respect our parents a lot, we are being expected to be nice to people, we love to ask : "Have you eaten yet ?" and "Don't forget to eat" or "Please eat something", we care to each other, we have monogamous marriage, we believe red means luck, we are keepers of everything, we pray to God and our ancestors, and  have I mentioned that we are being expected to be nice to people ? 

It happens in my family, when we are having a big family gathering, we always bring something to eat together. It's kind of potluck tradition in western countries. Then we have a good laugh and chit-chat with everybody. EVERYBODY. Your aunties, uncles, cousins, and all relatives whom they have a very special nickname depends on their relationship with parents. Yes, YES ! You can't call all of your aunties with "AUNTY" or uncles with "UNCLE" just like that. For your curiousity, you can watch this for details.


Seemed complicated. But it's fun to have this culture in my family. And I love them. I respect all of them. For sure I have my own life, but still I respect and until forever, my life will be completed with them. F*ck with other people who pursued me to leave them. Blood is thicker than anything, dude ! And no other woman who will love you more than your mom. And your parents, brothers, sisters, all relatives will always stand for you no matter how big the thunderstorm will come to you. I am blessed for having this (big big big) family.

Respecting others and being nice to people is also part of us. Well, at least in my family root. We always treat our guest like a king. We always serve them the best. Cook them good dishes or treat them in a nice restaurant. Make sure that they're enjoying their stay. Show them around or take them everywhere they want to visit. Oh yeah, and we will never let them pay. In my family, you will see this A LOT ! That during dinner or lunch treat, everybody will fight to pay.   
And it's true. It's in our blood. Sometimes our guests even don't feel nice with it. But hey, it's in our blood. We treat our guest like a king. We put ourselves in the second row. So, stay out of your negativity thought. We do this everyday, everytime, to every guests. IT'S NOT BECAUSE OF WE ARE EXPECTING SOMETHING IN RETURN FROM YOU. Please note this. And I inherit this in my blood. I can't count how many times my dad always fight to pay with my uncles or his friends, colleagues. I told you one more time : It's. In. Our. Blood.
Period !

Ah yes, and we care. About each other. And there's one more thing. Chinese people don't throw away things. We fix everything. And we keep everything. Even plastic bags.

Anyway, have you eaten yet ?

Monday, October 20, 2014

breathe


A very good friend of mine sent this to me. Well, it's true. Through the hard times, just breathe.... remember that I've been this uncomfortable and anxious and scared. But I've survived ! Thanks, buddy !

But I really can't count my blessing. It's just too much. I'm so blessed. Once my mom ever told me, "Don't put your hope to a man whom you love more. Give a chance to a man who loves you more. Because he will put your happiness in above of everything."
I ignored her. I walked with my own path. I entertained man whom didn't deserve. I went for romance because I wanted romance. And it ended up with huge disappointment. Can't describe how huge it was.

Romance will fade one day. And my mom was right. Once I had ignored a man who had claimed to me that he loved me a lot. It was the day I walked in other direction. And I was suffering because of my own ego. I was suffering because for compensation, I must worked too hard for someone I love, alone. He didn't even fight for me. He didn't even love me. All he's doing was sit back, relax, let me profess my love, provide everything to profess my love, and some words that I want to hear. I can say that men are expert of this. And I was suffering. Because  I want a commitment, monogamous relationship. But I had lowered my standard, I dealed with people who didn't deserve, I danced with an evil....

Steve Harvey ever noted in his book. A man who truly loves you will do 3 things : profess his love for you publicly, protect you by any means necessary, and provide for you, no matterif it's means there's nothing left for himself. He will not spend his money on trifling things and come to you with WHAT'S LEFT. He will not selfishly give you a little cut and take the rest for himself. If he's a real man, he will always sacrifice buying something for himself until he's fulfilled his responsibility to provide for you - which is showing his genuine love for his woman.

A man who is buying baubles and trinkets but refuses to give you what you really want -a true, monogamous, loving relationship, however.... is simply USING you. His sponsorship package may make you feel grateful to be with him, but really, YOU'RE BEING PLAYED. He's buying your kindness, your sex, your love, your affection, your devotion - a cool place to chill out and escape when he's facing problems with his wife or his girlfriend.

He reels you in by telling you he's with you because he can find peace in your arms. But you're not finding any peace.

Your job is to make clear what you want, and let him know that the true gift he can give - it's not material. It's true love. If he can't give that to you, then walk away. Do you understand what I'm saying here ? Walk. Away.

You've got to be willing to do this to get what you want. Don't be scared, if this man is giving you ONLY the material things, leave him and open yourself up to someone better - the guy who is willing to do what it takes to keep you.

I had realized that after I had passed all of this thunderstorm, I lowered my ego. There's no such thing called romance. All this lovey-dovey things were bullshits. Except from the one who had professed his love to me since 10 years ago. And he's loving me still. After all of this thunderstorm. Even I had nothing. Even I failed and lost everything. He's standing still to comfort me and raise me up.

Once again, my mom was right. I was the one who ignored this man. Who's standing there. Faithfully. Wait for me. Love me. Listen to me. And propose me with his open arms even I had hurt him by running in other direction. And he loved my son more than anything. And years are coming, but he's still there. His heart didn't change. Once he told me that I should value myself more, because I'm worth to fight for. He valued myself and put me in his highest priority. He didn't underestimate and never judge me. He loved me and he proved it.

Although I can provide myself, protect myself, but it's cute when he gave his everything to win my heart, fight for me, do everything to make me happy, give me a big share (or even all !) of his favourite food -because he knows I love to eat that food too, cook for me when I was totally sick, bring my son to school, and even after I had hurt him a lot, he's still faithfully waiting for me. I was there ! Same as him ! But for the other guy. The other guy whom didn't even deserve. Huge. HUGE. Disappointment.

Good man gets his reward now for his longterm awaiting.

Thank God, I'm beyond blessed.... Maybe I didn't get any romance, but I get peace. I didn't have any butterflies in my stomach with him, but I feel secure with him. I didn't need to worry for someone far away who will sweeten up words to hide the truth to comfort me. I didn't need to worry for a selfish guy who wants many women to satisfy him. I didn't need to worry for a sugar daddy for his justice to keep me among other of his women. WHY I SHOULD LOWER MY STANDARDS FOR MAN WHO DOESN'T DESERVE ?

Breathe. I'm not investing. I'm giving. And I will give it to someone who deserves.

Saturday, October 18, 2014

when she moved on

She moved on,
and I feel sorry for you
Because she thought you were the most amazing guy ever
If she could have had any guy in the world, she still would have picked you
And she trusted all of your past bullshits and promises
She's still taken a very good care and worried about you
She loved you in every part of her life
She even didn't expect for anything in return
She even didn't calculate whether you deserve or not
She did because she loved you
She didn't take your selfishness
She did because you're part of her life

Now you're just another part of her past,
a memory more faded every day,
pain was too much,

Well one day she will have the one who deserves her
and he will make her the happiest girl in the world.

So long, you !

XOXO !

Tuesday, October 14, 2014

my invisalign journey

FINALLY I HAD SENT MY OWN SCAN !!!!

To invisalign (yes, for myself !)
After 5+ months since I submitted my case !!!

Anne, my local representative always "kindly sent me reminder" for the last 2 months.... "Doctor, you should send your scan soon, or they will charge you for penalty fee."
Until she's getting very tired to send me this reminder. Because I didn't even can make it since I always put and submit all of my patients' cases in priority.

I submitted my case on May. And just few days ago, I sent my scan ! Wouahhhhh this one is absolutely my longest scan-submitting ever in my record.

My case itself is quite difficult. It's 9/10. Honestly, I should combine it with surgery to achieve a maximum result. But my colleague, an Invisalign expert from Singapore told me that he had done such kind of my case with Invisalign and it was very well treated. With maximum achievement result and a significant profile improvement. He encouraged me a lot to give it a try with my own case. So, why not then ?

I can't wait to start my invisalign soon !!!! Yaaaaaaaaayyyyyyy.... I will do couple of clincheck requests for extraction and non-extraction one. But more likely I will do 2 first bicuspids extraction. So, we will see !

Saturday, October 11, 2014

serial killer

Got a lot of kids coming to my clinic lately. Ok, kids are cute. They are lovely. Adorable. And so on.

But wait until they sit in your dental chair....

....well, some of them are still nice. Make up some words and play your poker face and everything will be fine. But some of them not. Not at all. They can turn you into a serial killer.

For me myself, I'm still OK with kids. While all of my colleagues in clinics, they avoid kids. See, kids ? Dentists are afraid of you ! Hahaha.... You must say WOW for that !!! 

I don't hate kids. Psychologically, I'm still can handle them well in my dental chair. A popular joke between dentists is, working with a cooperative kid is the best money-maker-ever (haha !!!). Everything are twice smaller, less treatment time, less material, less effort, everything are much more easier.... (if they can sit nicely and well behaved like adults do). The problem is if they are starting to become fussy and cranky. And everything will become 10 times harder. Be a serial killer will be your option, dentists.

Yesterday I got a kid with an early treatment concern from parents. This little client's behaviour was not really nice. Sometimes I forgot the word of PATIENCE if I have to work with very fussy patients. I started to raise my voice, and he became quiet. I don't care even he started to hate me or thought that I sound like his teacher at school. But with this kind of patients, you don't need to be TOO NICE. Too nice will kill yourself. Note this, dentists !

Well, back to Meijeer, my little client yesterday. He commented a lot that he didn't want to get an early treatment for his crowding teeth. He couldn't stop blabbering why his mom was taking him to this scary-auntie-dentist, and so on and so on. Hahahaha.... actually he looked cute when he was complaining like that. I almost rolled-out laughing while he's trying to negotiate with me.

Meijeer : "I don't want braces. I will not wear it !"
Me : "Well, I will put it in your mouth and unfortunately you can't take it off, dear."
Meijeer : "I will take it off !!!"
Me : "We will see if you can take it off..."
Meijeer : "I will ask my sister to take it off."
Me : "Oh, that's so lovely. Let me know if she can take it off for you."
Meijeer : "I hate you doctor !"
Me : "Thanks. You're the 100th kid who hate me. And I will give you a nice gift. A brand new wire."
Meijeer : "Aaaaaaa..... I hate you, I hate you. I will brush my teeth everyday so the braces will fall off."
Me : "Well, I love that. Brush your teeth everyday. But, unfortunately.... it won't make your braces fall off"
Meijeer : "Doctor, if I say that I love you... will you take off my braces ?"
Me : "Yes I will. After everything's straight, I will take it off."
Meijeer : "I love you doctor. Can you take it off now ?"
Me : "No, sorry. But I love you too Meijeer."
Meijeer : "Aaaaaaaaa..... You're a serial killer ! I hate my mom too."
Me : "I am. But I will make your teeth straight. And one day you will say thank you to your mom, because during your teenager age, you will become very handsome with your straight teeth and all of girls will like you !"

And he's stop complaining.

And anyway, he's still 8 yrs old. See how scary  adorable  lovely  well, I don't even can find any match words to describe him. Well, kids....

Monday, October 06, 2014

fight for this busy week



I love reading books since I was teenager. This hobby is continuing until now. Unfortunately, I don't like to read e-books. It doesn't feel like reading books for me. And weird thing is, I love reading journals or dental articles in soft copy version. While for novels or others, I prefer them on hard copies. Maybe you will wonder, WHAT ARE THE DIFFERENCES ?
Well, that's why I'm telling you that it's weird, haha....

Anyway.... good news for this new week is, finally I can beat up all of the viruses. My immune system's is upside down within last week, and I ate a lot of fruit to boost it. I can't be sick. First, I hate being hospitalized. And second, I can't imagine that my job will pile up if I'm sick, I get more upcoming lectures, my patients, also field trip plan with my dental assistants and their family (will bring all of them to Bali for holiday this month !!!). So, yeah, I can't be sick.

Will fight for this busy week ! Another new dental units installment, a new place for living, another business plan to do. All hopefully will be checked by the end of the month. Jia you !